Thursday, February 7, 2013
The Village continues to grow while retaining its inner Bedford Falls.
As every clock owner knows, the times they are a changin’. It certainly holds true here in the Garden Community. We move into our 75th year in full stride, boasting of archways and signage and streetscaping and a totally reimagined Mall. Our Village Leaders have done all this without a loss of innocence, without transforming our core essence. We remain way more Bedford Falls than Pottersville. I am fairly certain Mr. Gower is a manager at our Walgreens. The last time Greendale went through so much change was in 1938 – the big move from ‘cow pasture’ to ‘Village’. Historians refer to 1938 as “the year Greendale started making Greenfield look bad” – although some cows feel they – the cows - were doing this long before 1938. If you are …
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
March stands for something the other months are just a little uncomfortable discussing.
First things first. I need to apologize to my faithful readers – both of you – for the total lack of Inside the Bubble columns. I would like to offer you a good reason, a good excuse for the recent ITB drought. Instead, all I can tell you is my dog ate my laptop. Also, my vowels were at the cleaners and I misplaced the claim ticket. I'm sure you will agree the quality of any column drops drastically without vowel usage. Thank you for your understanding. Okay, a lot has happened since the last column, the biggest being that February has turned into March. And March 2012 is suffering from delusions of grandeur. For reasons beyond logic, March now thinks it is a summer month. While no one is complaining, the wise among us know somehow …
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
It almost seems like an annual thing, as Valentine’s Day once again sneaks into Greendale.
- VALENTINE'S DAY GUIDE
- Mike Vickery
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Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Okay, girls – get out. Like a good Deer Camp, this column is ‘Guys Only’… only less gassy. Or maybe more gassy – we have not decided yet. Bottom line, females, you need to click the next hyperlink out of here. You got five seconds. Go, go, go…nothing for you to see here. 5, 4, 3, 2… 1! Guys, it is now an estrogen free zone. You can stop holding in your gut. Let the dog in house. It is just us. Get rid of that coaster. Gentlemen, I hate call this Emergency Bro Meeting on such short notice. But, boys, we got Trouble. That is right, Trouble. With a capital T. And that rhymes V and that stands for… Valentine’s Day. Today. This is not a test. This is an actual emergency. A little history: This day used to be named “Saint Valentine’s…
Thursday, December 22, 2011
There are those who just scream subtle...
Hamlet had Horatio. While Hamlet – the Drama Queen / Danish Prince - hogs the spotlight, Horatio stands by his nutty friend. In fact, Horatio was all set to polish off the poison intended for Hamlet. Horatio - true, honest, rational, loyal and, according to legend, just two merit badges shy of achieving the rank of Eagle Scout. So Horatio was a Life Scout. Bottom line: You cannot do better than Horatio when it comes to picking a friend. Go make it right, Horatio. Frodo Baggins had Samwise Gamgee. Like Horatio, Samwise - the son of a gardener Hamfast Gamgee - is the unsung hero. Frodo, always weepy and weak, had to carry what? About an ounce of Ring? Samwise carried the luggage, did the cooking, put up with Gollum and bravely took …
Thursday, December 8, 2011
Some Inside the Bubble Tips to help you through the holidays.
The Most Efficient amongst us are, of course, done. Their lights are up, their Christmas cards have been sent and their holiday shopping is complete. Their receipts are doubled filed – alphabetically and by dollar value. In anticipation of less than acceptable gifts from the rest of us, they have already set up a procedure for returns. These people, the Most Efficient, will be taking down their Christmas decorations next week. They need to start prepping for Valentine’s Day. However, the rest of us have some Christmas work to do. Example: We have to pick up our gay apparel from the dry cleaner. Until then, it’s nothing but the donning of bland apparel for the foreseeable future. There was something to be said for the 12 Days of …
Thursday, August 18, 2011
Inside the bubble of Greendale, membership has its privileges.
The Wisconsin State Fair is over. How can you tell? Your odds of driving through West Allis, being pulled out of your car and being punched in the face have dropped substantially. This mob / gang activity was followed by the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel’s Eugene Kane’s very predictable ‘deflection’ article. Apparently - as Mr. Kane pointed out - we do not understand these marauding mobs. Plus, white folks have done some pretty nasty stuff, too. Absolutely. ‘Idiotic’ and ‘unacceptable’ are equal opportunity behaviors. We all have reason to blush. It makes you wonder who in their right mind would join a gang or be part of a mob. Well, me. Those that really know me are familiar with my desire – and failure – to join a gang. I like the…
Thursday, August 11, 2011
Trying to find some dirt in the Garden Community...
First, a little housekeeping. My apologies about the lack of a column last week. My vowels were at the cleaners. It turns out an all-consonant column is practically mpssbl 2 ndrstnd. Next, how is the world treating you? Pretty rough lately, right? S&P demoting the US from its highest rating sums things up rather well. S&P’s reasoning was, well, reasonable: We can pay our bills; we just have a horrible, dysfunctional government. The gang at KindaCare has a much better handle on the whole spirit of compromise. Appropriately, the approval rating of our current congress is at an all-time low. Recent polls show 82% “disapprove”, 4% were “too polite to say” and 14% approved. That 14% approved of the idiots in Congress is a bit shocking…
Thursday, July 21, 2011
How is your weather knowledge? This week's ITB includes a weather quiz - guaranteed to be more fun than an occluded front...
New Berlin reader, friend and Suburpia connoisseur, Michael Vukovic alertly called today’s column topic. He did so last Monday. “How can you not write about the weather?” Mike asked. “People will be thinking of nothing else this week.” Mike is right. As proof of weather preoccupation, I picked his wallet. Four bucks and an expired car wash coupon. He can have it back when the temps drop back to the 70’s. Weather is a huge business – one with an impressive marketing budget, dedicated cable networks, and whenever it wants it, lead-story status. Weather has Viper Radar. Do you? No, I didn’t think so. We are taught this lesson at a young age: Don’t mess with weather. And we do not. We revere weather. We want to tease John Malan for his…
Saturday, July 2, 2011
ITB - Lite: Less calories AND less taste.
Check the calendar. Check your BlackBerry. Check your pulse. It’s Summer! Quick, get moving. The rain has stopped… for now. You really do not have time to sit down and thoroughly peruse a whole column. With all due respect to Nat King Cole, this is no time for the “hazy, lazy days of summer” mind set. I, for one, am in Solstice Power Ranger Mode. So, rather than the usual long, rambling stuff I throw your way, I will give you 4 quick columns – really, more ‘run-on sentence’ than actual ‘column’. Celebrate the Summer Solstice with this ITB 4 Pack. (It was going to be a six-pack, but I had two on the way home.) ITB Solstice Column 1 - “Road Constructive Criticism”: As you know, asphalt is a mixture of aggregates, binder and filler. …
Friday, June 17, 2011
Tis a fine season for man and beast...
Ever find yourself doing something just because you have to? Like your job? I got to be honest with you. Suffering from PGS, (Post Graduation Syndrome), that is exactly where I am at as I tap out this week’s edition of Inside the Bubble. Really, if Viviana Buzo (Greendale Patch’s exceptional editor in chief) was not paying me obscene amounts of money to write a weekly column, I would have texted in sick. (By the way, let’s keep my obscene pay a secret from the other columnists. Shhhhh.) It will soon become very apparent to you that you are not getting my “A” Game. You are getting a solid D+ game, maybe a C- if you are feeling generous. But come on, you have had days like this too, right? It’s like I woke up on the wrong side of the …
Brody
11:20 pm on Sunday, March 24, 2013
I can't wait for this spot to open. more ›