Silence Me... Please

The NRA would like to arm Greendale's - and the nation's - schools. Solution or escalation?

“And if we threw it all away
Things can only get better”

Howard Jones


I am a Noun. 

Full disclosure: I am on the low end of the Noun ‘person, place, or thing’ trifecta.  I am a Thing. 

And as long as we are being honest, like those who do not pay child support and eight track players, I am a Useless Thing. Incredibly useless, without question.  I will be the first to admit it.  

However, I am one Thing that has been in the news a lot lately.  I need to make a statement.

Keep your expectations low.  As you know, Things are not deep thinkers.

(Look at the opening quote.  Howard Jones?  Only a Thing would quote Howard Jones.)

As you read on, it will become abundantly clear that Things are not great communicators.  Things are simple.  We lack the soul of Person, the view of Place.  We Things are, at our best, tools used and controlled by the Lord of Nouns, People. 

Before revealing my identity, I need to make two points:  One, I am big fan of the US Constitution and its Bill of Rights – considered royalty in the World of Things.  That Second Amendment?  Spot on. And two, the National Rifle Association has given me much support over the years – really, more than I deserve. 

Okay - full disclosure time:

I am an AR-15.

I am a legal weapon made for sales to the public sector. Here is where it goes sour: I am a semi - automatic weapon easily converted to a fully automatic weapon. I guess I personify the evils of too much of a good Thing.

I am not a rifle who is anti-gun.  That would be silly.  But, as a Thing in too many lead news stories, I need to make a stand and it is this:  Despite being one, I am anti-automatic weapon.  Sort of.  (I warned you about the lack of communication skills of Things.)

Things are not black and white, I am sure you will agree. You cannot say ‘all automatic weapons are bad’.   My cousin, the M-16, has its place in the military.  Automatic and semi-automatic weapons have their place – just not in the civilian world.  Hunters do not need us; clay pigeon shooters do not need us. Let’s be honest – outside the military, the world does not need me.  I will admit it.  I am a Bad Thing.

So why is it the NRA - made up of the Top Nouns (People) - will not admit the same thing about me, the AR-15?

The NRA was formed in 1871 by Colonel William Church and General George Wingate who were flabbergasted at complete lack of marksmanship displayed during the Civil War.  999 out of 1000 shots missed their mark.  The primary goal of the association would be to "promote and encourage rifle shooting on a scientific basis”.  The goal was to develop some practice rifle ranges and promote gun safety.  Good stuff.

Flash forward to 2012 and you got the NRA digging in a no compromise position defending me, the AR-15.  Stop it boys, you are making me blush.  It is not self-pity – (us Things are not burdened with such emotions - more Spock than Kirk) – when I say I am just not worth it.

I remember when Common Sense used to be a Thing.  I am pro Common Sense.  You Lord of the Nouns are at your very best when you exhibit abundant Common Sense. 

Go ahead and show some. Silence me.  Please.

Dennis Towle, Jr. December 28, 2012 at 05:11 PM
My friends at the NRA may all disown me, or maybe not. My ideology is ever evolving, just like our Earth and all the inhabitants thereof. My ideology is not necessarily yours, and I respect you for disagreeing (or agreeing) with me... I see no real or imagined need for the general public to own "assault" rifles including extended clips and magazines. There, I've said it. Now I'm sure that my NRA membership will be yanked. I truly believe in the 2nd amendment: "A well regulated militia being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed." I also believe that it is prudent and right to possess firearms for home and personal protection. But, assault rifles, while technically fulfilling those rights, step way beyond the phase of self-protection into another realm.
Dennis Towle, Jr. December 28, 2012 at 05:14 PM
Aside from the military, there is no logical reason that I have heard that could convince me that firing 30 rounds of bullets has any benefit other than to create a killing zone for human massacre. Period. End of discussion. Assault rifles are a good idea for video war games, but in the real world, nothing worthwhile is ever been shown for those 30 rounds outside of a military conflict. And by military conflict, I mean the militia that is established and run by the government, not 5 guys in camo hiding in the woods. Assault rifles in the public domain need to be confiscated. Drug cartels have them, street gangs have them, mafioso have them, terrorists have them. Wrong, wrong, wrong, and wrong again! When private citizens have them, the chance that a mentally challenged member of the family can get to them is not a chance that I am willing to live with. And, since no one can say for certain that they can perceive OR control mental illness, then that chance is beyond the limits that I am comfortable with.
Dennis Towle, Jr. December 28, 2012 at 05:16 PM
It doesn't take 30 rounds to take down a whitetail, unless you like hamburger meat. It doesn't take 30 rounds to take out the guy breaking into your house either. One shot to the kneecap ought to do it... if it doesn't, one shot to the head will take care of the idiot. Ban assault-type weapons and ban those clips and magazines that make "normal" weaponry go beyond what it was originally purposed for. That's all. Leave the rest of my guns alone... my shotguns, my rifles, my pistols, my revolvers. Those don't pose the same kinds of problems. Take these assault-type weapons off the store shelves and off our streets. Nothing good comes from these weapons.


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